5. WRITE IT ALL DOWN. As issues arise and emotions become clear, record them in a journal, or in a letter to yourself or to someone who has hurt you (don't send it, though!). "Allow similar memories to come to the surface and write about those as well," Simon advises. "Use language that accurately and fully expresses what you feel about the situation."
6. FIND RELEASE THROUGH RITUAL. Once you've identified the toxicity, create a ritual to release it: Throw a rock into the ocean, dance, walk, breathe, listen to music, write a letter and burn it, call someone you've been avoiding--whatever helps you consciously let go of poisonous emotions and symbolizes what is shifting. If you'd prefer to share your ritual with a friend, find someone you trust who'll be empathetic without attempting to solve or judge your problem.
7. REWARD YOURSELF. Enjoy a gourmet meal, luxurious bath, or day off. "It takes conscious awareness and a commitment to personal growth to go through the process of emotional release," says Simon, "so reward yourself for your good work."